This Time Last Year...

"This Time Last Year"

This is the title for my new series of posts. The idea came to me while I was strolling the babies around the neighborhood working on my Vitamin D synthesis (see last post, scroll down). I was thinking to myself how beautiful the day is and how I love the feeling of a good sweat met by the breeze and the smell of neighbors grilling out and little girls and boys running through the sprinklers in their yards. It made me think, gosh I love this time of year. Gosh...remember this time last year!?! I recalled going to watch Hunter G. play little league baseball out at Ray Thorington baseball park with Nick and "Jay-c" and Faye. Me, sitting in a fold up lawn chair, basking in the sun, 5 months pregnant, loving the attention for big "twin sized" belly in my summer tank top, and naturally, eating an entire baggie of hot salty boiled peanuts... because hey, if you can't do this when you are five months pregnant at a little league baseball game in Alabama, when can you?

This time last year the Ledford's came for a visit. Emily, Yvonne, Brea, Ali, and myself... oh! and don't forget little peanut sized Sloan (they had just found out) all played out in the back yard enjoying Spring.
This time last year Nick and I were getting the nursery ready. Picking out wall colors and crib sets and closet organizers. We had just found out "they" would be "girls" and we were thrilled.
This time last year we were expecting...

But not expecting THIS:



Yes, those are my feet, which at the time I affectionately named "Puffers" in all their swollen glory. As I strolled the 2.5 miles today with my girls I thought to myself "this time last year I wouldn't have dreamed of being able to squeeze into these same shoes much less walk 2.5 miles even if barefoot and being chased by a pack of wolves." Notice how in the second picture of my ankle-less ankle, "cankle," the couch has left an impression on my skin. OWWIE! Oh- and those little marks in the first picture? Flip flop indentations.

This time last year...sigh.

Omega 3 and Vitamin D

Today I am stacking up on Omega 3's and Vitamin D.

First off...for brunch I baked 4 ounces of salmon, 2 cups of spinach, and 2/3 cups of whole wheat/whole grain pasta with 1/2 tablespoon of half butter (1/2 EVOO, 1/2butter). One thing that I have been trying to do lately is make every bite count. It was 10:30a.m. and I had been up since 7a.m., skipped breakfast (shame), and didn't want to wait until "lunch time." After all my body was sending me hunger signals. So, it is not even noon yet and already I have had a rich dose of omega3 rich protein, leafy green vegetable, and whole grains.

Second, the sun is brightly shining and we are in April in Alabama which means the days of enjoying your time in the sun are numbering down. So I am loading up the babies and we are going for a stroll. Did you know that the sunlight activates the production of Vitamin B in your skin? I work in a concrete office with NO windows, not the slightest possibility of natural sunlight for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. So Vitamin D PLUS a sun kissed glow what more can a girl ask for? Also, I have gotten into the habit of drinking a tall glass of cold skim milk every night before bed. After child bearing and now that I am pretty regularly weight lifting and exercising it is very refreshing to know that I am putting back in my body what my bones so desperately need, especially on down the road.

Just thought I would share. I feel like I just wrote a mini commercial ;)

Mother's Address a Cold Beer

Yes it is Thursday night at 6:25p.m. My babies are feeling SO MUCH better. Harper has been on the Augementin for 3 days now (?) and doesn't even seem as if she was sick. Lily is on day two of her antibiotic that we give through a shot at the doctors office for three days. She was vomitting every time we gave her the Augmentin which obviously was doing no good for her double ear infection. Tomorrow should be the last day of her antibiotic and as for the throat ulcers she made it through the entire day without needing any tylenol or motrin or "magic mouthwash" (benedryl + malox for the ulcers) Still drooling and drooling and drooling. But hey, I'll take drool over vomit any day of the week. Last night was the first "normal" night as far as sleeping goes this week. They both went down fairly easy at 5:45p.m. and we did not hear a peep until they started chatting at 7a.m. So, no pain - check, eating - check, sleeping - check. Pat on the back to LJM for emergency babysitting Wednesday morning and also to my Mama this morning. When mother's arms can't be enough a God-mother or a Grand-mother will do just the trick. Also, a shout out to all my "go to Moms" -Lindsay, Stephanie, and Tracy - sound "I've been there before advice" and a good warm hug is always welcome. And of course, thank you to all of my blogger support. I sound like I am winning a major award here...

I'll say this too about my adorable and delicious children... they may fall hard at times but boy do they bounce back. I guess that goes for all kids but seriously these kids have been through hell and even in the worst of their trials they are still so incredibly sweet and loving and for the most part easy to manage.

And can I just say that now that H&L have been sleeping 10-12 hours for the last 6 months and then experiencing three nights of getting up every hour I CAN'T believe I did that and functioned for the first 3 months they were home? Seriously. To all my "soon to be parents" readers out there you won't know you are miserable but when you DO sleep again, you will wonder how the hell you did it when you did for as long as you did. You will amaze yourself.

So NOW my hair is wet, the sun is setting on this PERFECTLY SPRING evening, my grass has been PROFESIONALLY chemically treated for weed KILL (THANK YOU NICK!!!!), Ali is content lying in the grass, and the beer (soon to be as as soon as I finish typing this post) in my hand is COLD.

Sad Incorporated

It would appear that Lily may have Hand Foot and Mouth Disease characterized by throat ulcers, refusal to eat, constant drooling and gagging and vomiting, and screaming for hours on end. Moments like tonight when I am doing this by myself (Nick being at work and at school) I almost lose it but then remember that this time next week (hopefully) she won't remember this and she definitely won't remember this five years from now but I just can't help but cry for the pain she is in right now. Please don't allow her to get dehydrated. Please help the medicine stay down. And I pray to GOD please that Harper does not get this infection.

Ear Aches and Ulcers

That is what they have. The $40 co-pay was worth it to find out

• Harper has an infected right ear but no fever today
• Lily has an infected right and left ear plus ulcers in her throat and fevers all day
• Either a throw up bug OR the antibiotic is making their stomachs weak, either way they can't keep food or mild down.
• SAD
• BUT they have been sleeping now for 24 minutes... maybe they will go all night.
• PRAY

SO another round of antibiotic, alternating tylenol and motrin every 3 hours, and lots of TLC. Hey I can't complain too much... this is the first time we have had any illnesses since Harper came home from the hospital in February.

Monday Morning

So if I don't post these kinds of updates a month goes by and people ask "how are the girls?" and say "Great!" even thought we have had 48 hours such as these last.

Saturday afternoon Harper woke up from her nap just... funky. Fever 102, clingy, DROOLING. I attributed these symptoms to teething and hoped that a little Orajel and cold compresses would solve it. Not so much. She has cried and cried through the last two nights. If she isn't on me she cries. If I even break eye contact with her she cries. This is SO not Harper. When she does eat she throws it up. She also appears to have an aversion to her bed. Last night she slept with me in our bed and actually got some shut eye. No matter the space I put between us she

would find her way back to me and cuddle - which is sweet but is the cause of the stiffness I have in my neck and lower back. So this morning I put a call into the doctor and at 2p.m. I'llhope to have an answer. It could be teething but for $20 I think it is worth it to have a professional take that little black light thingy, stick it in her ear, and tell me that it is or is not an ear infection.

In February, God answer my prayers for donated sick days so I have NO stress at all about not being at work. My meetings can wait and compensatory services will be offered to the kids who sessions I am missing. My guess and 5 years experience tells me though that a rainy Monday morning after SAT and ARMT testing yields LOW attendance at school today anyway.

I hope that everyone else's Monday isn't as manic.

My Wonderful Beautiful Sister

Thursday night I was in bed at an exceedingly ridiculous early bedtime of 7:30p.m. when my sister called. To give myself the benefit of the doubt I WAS reading for about 2 minutes before she called. She said she had been in bed early the night before reading too... some book about being a successful women in corporate America... I was reading Sippy Cups are Not for Chardonnay. Awesome.

Anyway, my sister is 25, lives in Memphis, and is doing really well in her job as an accountant. Ole'Miss grad but Bama girl at heart. She is all of 113 pounds ( I don't think she cares if I mention this - I don't think she even reads this) and is the most wonderful beautiful gal I know. She dresses simply but elegantly. She doesn't wear too much makeup. She sometimes wears perfume. She has started caring about Church but has always reminded me of Alice in Wonderland when it comes to knowing God (a good thing). She says please and thank you but also says the F word a lot but she is the kind of person that it sounds hilarious and awesome when she says it. She regularly dines out at the most posh restaurants and swanky bars with rich guys and her friends. She throws tacky Christmas parties at her house every year. She doesn't make her bed and she sleeps in her contacts. She still wears some of the same garments that she wore in high school. She is a penny pincher but would give you the shirt off her back if you needed it. We didn't say "I love you" growing up. We said "olive juice" because we saw it meant "Iloveyou" in a movie once when we were little girls. One night a few years ago we were out having drinks at Sinclair's Old Cloverdale and she all of a sudden told me out of know where how much she looked up to me all growing up. This amazed me and in fact I think I said something like, "really!?!? I thought you hated me!?" I wish I could tell some of my favorite conversations we have had but she would kill me. Last year when I was in the hospital on bedrest, she called me at like 8:00 at night. She was crying (very rare for her) and saying that she was at a wedding a couple of hours before and that now she was at the reception but that at the wedding she got so choked up because it reminded her of me and of Nick and she just wanted me to know that she is worried about the babies and that she hoped everything will be o.k. and that we didn't deserve to be going through this and that she is so sorry she isn't there... I interrupted and said, "Mere, are you drunk?" and she said through laughing tears, "a little but I mean it!!?!?!" We both laughed and I said "I love you too" and hung up.

Tell me about your sister or brother.

Nice is such a great word

I liked it better when my blog was called "baby steps." That's that.

***

@ JMG and his post on Stuff.

My plans are to dig into the kitchen drawers and shelves and the buffet and organize what we use often, find a place for what don't use often, and box up what we never use and give it to someone who will. Cleaning out is like losing weight - it just feels GOOD no matter how much just as long as you are losing.

***

@Oprah

There were two great shows I watched this week. One was on Confessions of Motherhood and the other was on Losing Weight in the Public Eye. These two topics are two topics I confront every day. I love being a mother; I think I have made that quite clear in my relationships and in other posts. There was one statement a mother made on the show that really rang true with me. The panel was discussing how women tend to "lose themselves" when they enter motherhood (a WHOLE 'nother post). That may be true for some. Not for me. I have never been more in touch with "ME" in all of my life. However, one mother said something like, "when women have children it is usually when they can say 'well I have already traveled enough or shut down every bar in town' I think I am ready to settle down and have a baby'. Then she said what women don't realize is that when you have a baby you are just less available to the other people in your life that "were" so important - so present. At first, you stop running into a gas station for a pack of gum. Then, you stop scheduling lunch dates with a girl friend and going to the movies with friends. Then, the girlfriend who just went through a breakup or a fight with her mom doesn't call you any more because she assumes you are too busy or in bed so she deals with it alone or calls someone else. *** When she said that, I got a knot in my throat because I know that I have friends that assume I can't be there for them because I am a mom now. But I am still a friend too. At least I want to be. Piggy backing on that... My kids are a good 1 year to 1.5 years older than my friends' babies (and future babies) so I say with desperation and sincerity to them that I am genuinely excited to spend more time with you and help you (if you want it) when Nick isn't in classes at night and my babies don't "need me" as much at bed time (5-6pm). Ok enough on that.

***

@Maughry, "In Which I Brag About Myself"

(your own little personalized post inside of a post ;)

Can I please tell you that I ran on Tuesday. Not ran out of formula... RAN, at the gym on a treadmill. I RAN, not five minutes, not ten minutes, but THIRTY minutes which was two miles. I know that is a pretty slow mile but I don't care... I ran without stopping for the first time in my life. Wasn't it you this summer that I told I could never run and wish I could love to run like you and other "runners?" Ok so I jogged but I jogged my heart out. I kept thinking of the contestants on the Biggest Loser and how they push themselves so hard every day all day and that I could at least push myself for thirty minutes. I am VERY proud of myself. Also I have lost 8 pounds. For this I am also very proud.

***

The perfect four day weekend starts now. I have the babies at home because the sitter's twins are ill :( But I am glad to have this time with mine. They are very very well. Almost 11 months old and just bubbly every day with new milestones and emerging personality traits that really make being their mother a joy. I read somewhere that today's assignment is to brag about your kids.

So I will start with Harper:

-she is patient

-she is an observer

-she plays gently with her toys

-she loves it when I read to her

-when she smiles it feels like she is saying, "Hey Mama, you're pretty" in a very sweet quite shy voice

-she likes to play on her back

-she has two bottom teeth

-she makes it very clear when she is ready to go down for a nap by throwing herself backward into an arch as if to really say "put me DOWN"

-she is not a picky eater

-she babbles Mamamama and Nanananana and Dadadadada

Lily

-she is attentive

-she is very hands on during play time

-when she smiles it feels like she is saying , "HEY MAMA!! GET ME GET ME GET ME!!!!"

-she likes to nap on my chest

-she also has two bottom teeth

-she is very close to sitting up on her own

-she also babbles mamamma and dadadadada

Neither one have been sick since February, praise God. And speaking of God, I hope that everyone will have a wonderful Easter. What a special season and celebration for believers. Whether you go to church or not do what you do with joy and peace.

***

This was nice.