Thursday, July 31, 2008

Infants are the Most Influential People in the Galaxy and They Won't Take No for an Answer and They Hurt My Ears Sometimes

Reporting live: 4:17a.m.

I have just debated with Lily for approximately 25 minutes on the topic of "eating off schedule."  A schedule is a schedule and countless moms I know have said to obey the schedule and not to get them off the feeding schedule and whatever you do don't feed one without feeding the other.
Wake the other one up to feed them too or you will NEVER sleep.  This has worked up until this point when 
a) 2 ounces isn't enough to last 3 hours
b) Lily is trying to break me down

Here is what happened:

She grunted at about 3:34 this morning that "now might be a good time to eat?"  
I said, "Pshhh, feeding time isn't until 5a.m.!"  
"Naaaaa, what about now?" she tried again.  
"Oh come on... now there is only like 54 minutes until 5.  How about this nice rubbery paci?" 
[the infant then projected the paci out of her mouth onto the bedroom floor in protest of ]
I made my final offer, "You want to get in bed with me?  Will that hold you over till 5a.m." [infant grins and lays by my side for about 7 seconds then]

So I thought that is what she wanted... the story goes on.
I pick up Lily and we walk into the kitchen.  She is screaming into my ear this piercing cry that makes me bounce her up and down and repeat a combination of "shhh, PLEASE" and "please stop please stop crying, seriously, I am pouring your milk as fast as I can, please stop screaming in my ear."  As the milk is heating up on the counter I go to the couch to change her diaper.  She screams through this process also so again I offer the paci; she accepts.  I go to get the milk and even though she is not scheduled to eat for another 45 minutes or so I say to myself "feed her now she is hungry forget the schedule OBVIOUSLY my child needs food I'll wake Harper too this just means I'll sleep till 7 instead of 8 then wake them up again to get back on the schedule yea this is the right thing to do ok the milk is hot let's see now where is the boppy oh here it is where is the baby?...."  I stumble back to the couch and there she is fast asleep.  
"Seriously?  All you needed was a diaper change?"
No wonder you wouldn't accept my bargains earlier.

So now it is 4:39a.m. I am pumping because it would be painful to go BACK to sleep only to have to get up again at 5 to actually feed except exactly 30 seconds ago she screamed bloody murder again to the point I had to say, "Nick I'm sorry please go feed her her milk is warm its on the couch."  And when someone has been screaming in your ear for almost an hour you feel that kind of desperate where you think and talk in run-on sentences....

It's 4:42 I am not asleep feeding has gone from every three hours to whenever my children scream bloody murder and I give them food but why don't they do this during the day why is it only at night that they throw these fits will we ever sleep i have heard of babies doing this up through the first year oh my sweet Lord give me the strength....


Eleanor said...

I think Lily just wanted some alone time with you. ;-)

My oldest son -- your FRIEND -- was a fiend. We lived in a house without air conditioning until he was 2 years old -- in Montevallo -- and he was a colic-y baby. Worst day of my life was when it was 112 degrees, I had one fan, he was screaming non-stop for 6 hours in the middle of the day, and I rocked him and cried and read him "To Kill a Mockingbird."

After he grew up it got harder and harder to get him to even sit in the same room with me for 10 minutes, and I couldn't believe how much I missed that old rocking chair, or that old fan, or my arms around him trying to do the best I could as a clueless mom.

Treasure these moments, write them on your heart.

Eleanor said...

Oh -- and sometimes, just get in the shower and shut the bathroom door and have a good scream!

Stephanie said...

This from a hardcore scheduling mom -

They hit growth spurts and get hungry before they are "supposed" to. Schedules are key to your sanity, but follow your baby's lead, too. I will feed Silas at 2 1/2 or 2 3/4 hrs in a heartbeat if he's starving. The next time around I'll just see how he's doing. If he'll go 3 1/2 hours I'll let him to get back on "time", but if he won't, we just stick to the 3-hr routine rather than a time-specific schedule. I have to do this almost every day at some point or another. Nobody told HIM he is supposed to eat at 4. ;)

Also, breastmilk doesn't stick to their bones as much as formula does, so I've heard that breastfed babies often get hungry a little earlier than 3 hours.

The sad (but good, too) reality is that the more they wake up and become aware, the more they're going to screw with your plans.

You're a lot more pragmatic about sleep than I am. If I have 15 minutes, I go back to sleep. The past few days/nights have been the absolute hardest in Gates Family History, with Asher so sick and Silas fussy from shots. Last night Asher finally fell asleep at 1:30, Silas woke up to eat at 3:00, then again at 6. I still went to sleep in between. I can't sleep during the day, so I have to take what I can get at night.

Good luck.

Shea said...

Oh Laura...I so feel for you. It feels like it has been such a long time since I was trying to put Savannah on a feeding schedule. You are doing such a great job with two! I can't imagine!! There were times when I ended up nursing her around the clock - just because I couldn't handle the crying anymore! I hope you are getting some sleep somewhere in there and getting lots of good meals!

Mary Tyler S. said...

I loved how there are hardly any "periods" in this post. I can't give any advice but I can certainly give you encouragement! This is an appropriate time to call you sweet mama, a steel magnolia.

"All night, all day, angels watching over me, my Lord.All night, all day, angels watching over me.

Sun is a-setting in the West; angels watching over me, my Lord. Sleep my child, take your rest; angels watching over me.

All night, all day, angels watching over me, my Lord. All night, all day, angels watching over me. "

luke said...

this post reminded me of some weird Hunter S. Thompson ramble, had Hunter S. Thompson ever had the privilege of motherhood.

sometimes all i need is a diaper change, too.

Laurel said...

...bless you Laura!
your honestey is refreshing and I love all the run-on sentences!

hang in there!

Mom said...

Laura--this too shall pass! Getting it off your chest will help and sooo many of us have been there and we and the child survived. You just hand in there. You are a great Mom. MT"s Mom