It's the first day of Fall and I couldn't be more excited.
The heat and humidity has seemed to let off a little and at certain times of the day it is quite nice to be outside. I love the smell of my living room after the sliding door has been left open for a little while. I know the season is changing when sleeping with the fan on is a little too cool for my comfort. One thing I hate to see is gals a little too excited for Fall and wearing turtlenecks in September... pace yourselves on busting out the new wardrobe, it's not THAT cool yet.
And so I am counting down the days that my maternity leave will end. My first day back at work will be Monday November 3 and I have mixed emotions. On one hand I am a little giddy to be getting back into a work routine and making money but on my other 5 hands I am really anxious. The babies are spending a lot more of the day awake and are doing some cooing and smiling. If they are upset they instantly calm when I pick them up to cuddle and feedings have been much more pleasant. No more choking and we have settled on a formula that minimizes spit up. These accomplishments met paired with longer periods of sleep at night make mothering even more enjoyable. And so soon I will have to drop them off at another mother's home for her to take care of them while I ... essentially take care of other people's kids at school. Ug. It makes me sick to my stomach. I am scared for Harper and Lily and I am scared for me. I fear that missing them will be unbearable but something I will just have to "get used to." I hate it. Having these 5 month with them is an amount of time that the majority of mothers do not get and so for that I am grateful. Loving these little girls is a feeling I can't describe and if you are a mother or are expecting to be one then you know what I mean.
This weekend was good. Saturday we spent the morning and early afternoon in Opelika at my dad, "Sherm-Grandy's" house to watch the Tide take another win. Saturday evening friends from out of town gathered with in town friends for football and food... what better combination? Before our company came I went on a cleaning frenzy and swept the hardwood floors AND polished them too. It is so nice to walk around the house and not be followed by a pack of "dust bunnies." Most laundry was washed and folded and the kitchen is decent. For me, a clean house is half of what keeps my mind sane.
Today I will be finishing a book I have been trying to get through for the past couple of weeks, The Shack. Interesting book - tells the story of Mack whose 6 year old daughter is murdered and three years later he goes to the scene of the crime for a weekend of fellowship and conversation with a black woman (embodying God), an asian man (Jesus), and an oriental woman (the Holy Spirit). Mack seeks answers and the threesome seek his heart and a relationship... not the gushy gushy feel good read but instead, insightful and challending train of thought that makes you wonder and perhaps change your own dialogue in your own times of questioning.
Lily is calling and it is time to feed again...unfortuneatly I did not make time to feed myself between 8:15 and now so now I am hungry. I wish I could catch this pitiful pouty face for all of you to see... not mine... Lily's. Talk about tugging at my heartstrings...
5 comments:
I'm so offended. I'm wearing a turtle neck right now.
jk :)
First, I read the Shack last week. A must read. Very thought provoking and has changed a lot of my daily thinking and communing with the Lord. Glad you're reading it. Second, so sorry about all the mixed emotions about having to leave your babies. I know that it must be such a hard decision. Enjoy your next weeks and don't do too much housework!! :)
Yay for fall! It is absolutely wonderful to know that the heat waves are leaving and cool breezes are blowing in.
We are starting fall weather here too and a couple days ago I had my second Spiced Pumpkin Latte. Ahhhhhhh. That's what I'm talking about!
I am dying to read The Shack.
I have done the stay at home and working mom thing. Whichever God calls you to, He will give you peace.
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